“We are given one life, and the decision is ours whether to wait for circumstances to make up our mind, or whether to act, and in acting, to live.” — Omar Nelson Bradley

If we long for ‘a good life,’ we must be willing to make choices that will take us there. So often, people are crippled by their inability to decide what they want to do. Unfortunately, when we don’t choose for ourselves, life will choose for us, and we may not like what we end up with.

Decision-making doesn’t have to be so painful because although our minds may be confused, our bodies usually know what’s best for us. Try this experiment. When you are faced with making a decision, imagine yourself selecting one option and tune into your body. How do you feel about making that choice? Are your muscles tight or relaxed? Is your breathing shallow or expansive? How much energy do you sense within you?

Now imagine yourself choosing a different option. How does your body feel about that one? The key here is getting out of our thinking and opening to the messages of our heart. Our hearts won’t lead us astray.

“Be willing to make decisions. That’s the most important quality in a good leader. Don’t fall victim to what I call the Ready-Aim-Aim-Aim Syndrome. You must be willing to fire.” — Boone T. Pickens

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“Success means fulfilling your own dreams, singing your own song, dancing your own dance, creating from your heart and enjoying the journey, trusting that whatever happens, it will be OK. Creating your own adventure!” — Elana Lindquist

We’ve been taught to believe that we need to “make things happen.” But opening to the flow of life requires that we let go of our need to micromanage and control. It asks us to open to the possibility that we don’t need to work so hard. Going with the flow asks us to trust that life will bring us what we need and want.

It takes courage initially to surrender to the flow of life. But once we’ve experienced how effortless it is to go with the energy, we gladly adopt this new and joyful way of living.

“Embrace fully your capacity to create, to think in unlimited ways, and to pursue everything that you have been wanting. Be flexible, open and willing to let the new come to you. …This can be the most joyous, prosperous, and creative time of your life.” — Sanaya Roman and Duane Packer

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“The future, higher evolution will belong to those who live in joy, who share joy, and who spread joy.” — Torkom Saraydarian

Some of us believe that it’s selfish to seek our own happiness. But if we reflect on how we interact with the world when we’re happy, we can see how this serves. We have more vitality. We’re more loving and generous to others when our own needs are met.

How can you live your joy each day? Your unique gift to the world will be found in those pastimes you love the most. In truth, joy is one of the greatest gifts we can give to people around us. Those who are unhappy need our joy, not our sadness.

“Joy is prayer – Joy is strength – Joy is love – Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. She gives most who gives with joy.” — Mother Teresa

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“Most smiles are started by another smile.” — Frank A. Clark

Smiles are such simple but powerful gifts! If I put a smile on my face when I’m feeling down, my spirits will automatically lift. The body knows that a smile means happiness.

And they are so contagious! Spread them generously and the world will thank you for it!

“Smile at each other, smile at your wife, smile at your husband, smile at your children, smile at each other – it doesn’t matter who it is – and that will help you to grow up in greater love for each other.” — Mother Teresa

“We know too much and feel too little. At least, we feel too little of those creative emotions from which a good life springs.” — Bertrand Russell

In our overly rational world, we tend to think about how we feel, which, of course, is not feeling at all – it’s thinking.

Honour your feelings and be willing to experience them. They give us valuable feedback about what is and what is not working in our lives. They are the signposts to meaningful inner work.

“Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge.” — Audre Lorde

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“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” – Sidney J. Harris

Everything in the universe, including us, is fundamentally energy. We block the flow of energy when we’re stressed. Everything works better – our bodies and the details of our lives – when we can relax, let go of resistance and go with the flow.

Deep breathing is a powerful way to release tension. Stretching is also helpful. And watch your self-talk. Negative thinking is a primary cause of stress, so choose to focus on what you want – not on what you don’t want.

Life is so much more enjoyable when we’re relaxed!

“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass on a summer day listening to the murmur of water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is hardly a waste of time.” – Sir J. Lubbock

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“Caresses, expressions of one sort or another, are as necessary to the life of the affections as leaves are to the life of a tree. If they are wholly restrained, love will die at the roots.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne

How do you prefer to be ‘hugged’?

Wally Minto taught that people tend to be either touchers or non-touchers. Touchers love physical contact – that’s how they express and receive love. Non-touchers, on the other hand, express and receive love through loving words. They prefer to be touched with the words “I love you” rather than to be physically embraced.

Are the significant people in your world touchers or non-touchers? Brighten their day by giving them the ‘hugs’ they prefer!

“To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.” – Anthony Robbins

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“Ultimately, we have just one moral duty: to reclaim large areas of peace in ourselves, more and more peace, and to reflect it towards others. And the more peace there is in us, the more peace there will be in our troubled world.” — Etty Hillesum

Peace, joy, health and well-being can only be found inside us. They exist within us now, waiting to be discovered. Yet we tend to look to the outside world to satisfy our needs and longings.

Getting into the habit of meditating, praying and/or resting daily helps us pull back from our preoccupation with the material world. In silence and solitude, we have an opportunity to pay attention to what’s happening inside rather than outside.

When we do this consistently, we begin to relax. We learn to quiet and detach from our mental chatter and our turbulent emotions. As we begin to witness ourselves in personality, we also begin to experience the peace, beauty, love and wisdom of our soul.

“The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom.” — James Allen

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“What I want in my life is compassion, a flow between myself and others based on a mutual giving from the heart.” — Marshall B. Rosenberg

How do we support others who are suffering?

Not wanting to see others in pain, we usually try to do whatever we can to take their pain away. Unfortunately, this rarely helps in the way we intended. In reality, we can’t take away their suffering. What we can do is be fully present with them to acknowledge and share in their pain. With compassion, we can keep them company.

It also helps others when we can be present to our own experience and genuine in our feelings. Living our own truth helps create the space for the other person to live theirs.

“The first duty of love is to listen.” — Paul Tillich

“With the gift of listening comes the gift of healing.” — Catherine de Hueck Doherty

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